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Teen Advice
This is the general teen advice section. Ask away on any advice questions that you may have. All of our advisors are current students except for kyleftydude, who is the one adult advisor on the site.
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All advisors for Teen Advice are Student Center members. They will answer your questions carefully and thoughtfully. We currently have 4 active advisors in this section. You can click on an advisor's name below to view his/her profile, or click here to Ask our Advisors!
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Read the most recently answered questions below, or click here to read older advice. Before you ask a question, read through some of the older advice - your question might have already been answered!
| Topic: |
General |
| Date: |
November 17, 2009 |
| kiki ! asks: |
Hi. I'm a freshman in high school and I'm kinda confused. So i would walk pass this guy almost everyday and i would always look at him because i like him and he started flirting with me recently but the only thing is that he is 17 going on 18 and i'm 15. Of course my dad would throw a fit about that but for some reason i attract older guys and i don't look no older than 17. I don't know if When i do decide to date weather or not i should date someone my one my age or a year older than me or the 17,18 & 19 year olds that approach me. i mean i do like some guys in that age range but the main reason why i always turn them down is because i think that they want sex and thats not something that im going to give and i say if tha's the case we should just remain friends. Should i get involved? or is that a bad idea?
thanks <3 |
| logomaniac says: |
It's not whether you should get involved with someone or that you should start dating. There is no right answer for that. Wait for someone you are interested in and see how things progress. There is no right time to start dating and no perfect answer for who you should be interested in. Interest happens naturally so enjoy being single for now and when you find someone you want to date, let it progress how it will.
I will say it's good that you have a firm stance on your opinion about sex for now. That's very important, but don't discount dating entirely because of that. When you're in a relationship you can definitely still have the opinion that you don't want to have sex. It's a choice that doesn't need to be sacrificed just because you are in a relationship. |
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| Topic: |
Dating |
| Date: |
November 15, 2009 |
| trixipixie asks: |
I'm a freshman in high school, and I have been with my boyfriend for almost a year now.
I really really really REALLY love him, and I know he loves me back as well.
However, the situation is that our parents do not agree to us going out. We're both asian, so our parents are both go by the "no dating till college" rule. I believe my parents are in the wrong with this. They say that I'm not allowed to date because I'm too young, it'll kill my grades, I'll end up being hurt, I don't know what's right and wrong. I have straight A's in all my classes right now, I've BEEN hurt already by a previous boyfriend, so I know what it feels like and how to get over it, I'm not "too young", I've known people who've gotten together in sixth grade and have STAYED together, and they think I don't know what is right and wrong because they haven't adjusted to the fact that I've grown up. I also believe they don't trust me to do the "right thing". My boyfriend and I are both really frustrated by the fact that our parents will not allow us to be together. I've cried over this, so has my boyfriend, and it's really hurting us. We've decided to confront our parents about it after we've been together for a year to show our dedication, but I'm afraid it won't work. How do I convince my parents to let me go out? PLEASE help. |
| logomaniac says: |
You need to show your parents your maturity. Not just yours, but his as well. While getting and mantaining good grades in school does help with that, lying to them and eventually surprising them with the fact that you've been going against their wishes fora year with a boyfriend isn't really a good idea. It may seem like a way to prove to them it will work out but it would only prove to them that they can't trust you.
You may not agree with your parents but they do seem like, while a bit unreasonable, they really care for you and are only being unreasonable to protect you. It isn't that they don't trust you, all parents worry about their kids- it's sort of their job. If you are really set on dating this guy then you need to do the "right thing" by going to your parents now. Sitting down with them and saying that you realize your culture has a big influence on their guidelines for you as a teenager and as their daughter but you would like the chance to prove your maturity. You are not a grown up, though it may feel like it. You do need to realize that you won't always make the right decision so arguing that you know everything already isn't a good way to convince them. Instead, talk it out with them. Take every objection they have to it and truly think it over, figure out why you believe it's a false objection and that way when you sit down with them and your bf you are prepared to answer any questions they might have for you. |
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| Topic: |
Dating |
| Date: |
November 14, 2009 |
| secert lover asks: |
I'm a junior in high school. I met this amazing guy, hes perfect. His looks and personality is unbearable. He is one of my classes, he flirts with me all the time and everyone in that class can see it. They can tell that hes definitely into me and that hes a big flirt. He asked for my number almost everyday three days straight but i said no flat out. The third day i said fine i only give him half though. The next day he asked for it again so i gave in and i gave him the full number. He didnt have paper so he memorized the number. Suprisnigly he did memorize it and he texted me that day. He would text me randomly on random days(not everyday though) Later on after a few weeks, I found out that a i failed a quiz. He texted to let me know and then he offered to study with me next time and to help me pass next time. From the texts he sends you can tell he defintely likes me atleast thats what my friends told me when i showed them the text messages. And he loves to tease me in class, laugh, joke around with me and stare at me all the time everyday. I have been trying my best not to like him. The thing is he has a girlfriend of two years. Hes a quarterback and shes the cheerleader. As you can see they have alot in common. They fight alot and she likes him more than he likes her. I dont know what to do. Should I earse his number? Should I like him wishing that he would break up with her and come to me? PLease help me what should i do?
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| logomaniac says: |
You can't help who you like. But you can make the decision based on what you think is right in this situation or not. He has a girlfriend so he's taken. I would suggest that you let him figure out his relationship situation on his own. If he wants to call you, make sure he realizes that it can only be as friends while he's still in a relationship.
It's not wrong to like him, but while he's in a relationship, it's wrong to act on that. |
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